Friday July 27

Nora Ephron’s I Feel Bad About My Neck: All Wit and All Honesty

I know Nora Ephron as the iconic name behind those rosy Manhattan love stories I couldn't get enough of as a kid -- "When Harry Met Sally," "You've Got Mail," "Sleepless in Seattle." I’ve watched these movies so many times that I became convinced my love life would turn out exactly like Meg Ryan's (and felt slightly betrayed by Ephron when it didn't). But for a woman who mastered the art of the romantic comedy, Ephron's own experiences with love were less than rosy. She reveals this along with an array of personal impressions of aging and life's ups and downs -- during which she always managed to keep her sense of hope and humor -- throughout her 2006 collection of candid essays, I Feel Bad About My Neck.

Ephron writes about divorce as if it were a pair of designer shoes -- something every woman has the right to at least one of -- but also hints at its darker side. "In a divorce, you never tell your children that you were once madly in love with their father because it would be too confusing," she advises in "The Story of My Life in 3,500 Words or Less." Yet Ephron never gave up on love, and despite betrayal, chose to love fiercely in many areas of her life.

In "Serial Monogamy: A Memoir," Ephron details her love affair with food, sparked by The Art of Gourmet Cooking, the first cookbook her mother gave her when she moved to New York in 1962. While she admits to some of her culinary flops, Ephron never stopped delighting in the joy of food.

In "Moving On" Ephron writes about one of her more fickle lovers -- her first New York apartment in The Apthorp on the Upper West Side. Starting at $1500 a month for a five-bedroom (I sobbed when I read that), Ephron falls hard and does not let go, even when building politics get dirty and her rent rises 400 percent in three years. Eventually, she is forced to leave The Apthorp and moves to the Upper East Side, where she reluctantly falls in love again, this time with her new neighborhood.

While much of I Feel Bad About My Neck is about endings -- the end of marriage, the end of cheap apartments, the end of youth and tight necks -- with Ephron there is always a sense that you can start over, that a new beginning is never far behind, especially with a little Botox. "You can always change your mind," she once said. "I know; I've had four careers and three husbands." I'm sure she also meant that you can always fall in love, no matter how many times it has let you down. In these essays, Ephron masters the art of the romantic life and makes you fall in love with her all over again.